Anarchy for Konoha High
by Wilhelm Fink
Summary: Naruto and co. are sick and tired of the militaristic style of their school and are going to take action. How? By taking down and then taking over the school one action at a time.
1. Diabolic Scheme

**Anarchy for Konoha High**

**Chapter 1: Diabolic Scheme**

**Notes:** First off, very OOC. The characters' personalities are based of of my friends and I. After the death of my original high school fic Konoha High, I needed something to fill the void. In this fic and some of the plans are real. Things we just wish we could accomplish. Story takes place in modern times too. (11/14/04: I updated this chapter bit. Changed it around so their a bit older so they can drive and shit now.)

---

Naruto tipped his seat backward and looked up at the ceiling. He sighed, blowing some blonde hair out of his face. Five weeks of his sophomore year of high school remained and he and his friends had already had enough of the militaristic style they had to endure. A strict dress code of blue uniforms for the boys and a white shirt, green skirt and red scarf for the girls. He looked over to Shikamaru who instead of listening to the teacher, was preoccupied playing games on his calculator.

The teacher rambled on about useless math formulas that they would never need to use. The seconds ticked by slowly and on top of that, lunch was the next period of the day. As Naruto awaited the miso flavored ramen in his locker, Sasuke and his brother Itachi were having a staring contest in the back of the class.

"I don't like you," Sasuke said.

"...yeah?" Itachi asked.

"Yeah,"

They continued to glare at each other until Neji broke it up. "Could you guys look more queer? Itachi, you have purple fucking nail polish and Sasuke...well...I just plain don't like you,"

The brothers sat in a loss for words. They turned back toward the front but soon after the teacher's droning monotonous voice lulled them into a state of sleep. Even the ever studious Sakura was having trouble staying awake. But everytime she closed her eyes, Ino began throwing paper at her. The one time she retaliated, the teacher caught her.

"Miss Haruno!"

"Hai sensei?" she asked nervously.

"Why are you throwing paper in my classroom while i'm trying to teach a lesson?!"

"I uh...that is to say," she began.

"Because she's probably bored as hell like the rest of us," Naruto said, saving her.

The class began to laugh. The teacher quickly shushed them and pointed a yard stick at Naruto.

"Mr. Uzumaki! I will not tolerate any of that in my classroom. Come to my desk and sign this referral!"

Knowing that things would only get worse, Naruto went up to the desk and signed the piece of yellow paper. He then walked back to his desk and slumped down into his chair.

"Was that worth it Mr. Uzumaki?"

Naruto paused for a moment and a smile came to his face. "Every second of it,"

The teacher shrugged his comment off and went back to teaching his lesson. Naruto ran his fingers through his hair and sighed.

_25 days and counting..._

---

At lunch, the group sat at their long table. Naruto happily slurped up his ramen, the girls talked about boys and makeup and the other guys were just sitting there...plotting. As Naruto finished, Shikamaru called out his name. Naruto turned to him and answered.

"What?"

"Naruto. I know you as well as I am sick and tired of this troublesome school," he said.

"You're damn straight. We're not in the military,"

"I know," Chouji said between bites of his sandwich. "How can we check out the ladies when they're always wearing thoes uniforms?"

Naruto and Sasuke looked over at him. "Is that all you think about?" they asked in unison.

"Hey, I transfered here to be with you guys and some hot girls. My old school had like...ten. No...seven,"

Naruto and Sasuke turned back toward Shikamaru and shook their head. "That Chouji," Sasuke laughed.

"I have an idea," Naruto said diabolically. "It's time for change here at Konoha High,"

"For once the idiot is right," Sasuke said.

"Thanks for the comment Sasuke. That means a lot to me," Naruto said sarcasticly.

"But back to my idea. I think we should form a group and try to bring down the system before summer comes so next year, we'll rule the school,"

The group smiled. "I like your thinking Uzumaki," Neji said. "So basically it's..."

Naruto cut him off. "Anarchy for Konoha High,"

They smiled again. This caught the girls' attention. "What are you guys smiling about?" Ino asked.

Naruto, the self appointed spokesman for the group turned toward them. "Something you probably wouldn't like,"

"Wait Naruto. I heard the words school and change," Sakura said. "What is this about now?"

"Should I tell'em boys?" Naruto asked.

They gave Naruto the ok with a nod and he began to speak. "Basically, we're going to overthrow the school. We could always use some extra help,"

The girls contemplated between themselves for a moment and agreed. "We'll do it. Anything to ditch these uniforms,"

"How about you ditch them right now?" Sasuke asked.

They laughed for a second. "You like that wouldn't you Sasuke," Temari said from behind him.

He turned around and smiled. "Hello,"

"What do you seem so happy about?" she asked.

"Taking over the school," Sasuke said.

"Anarchy eh?" Temari asked.

"Yes...anarchy indeed," Neji said.

"Well count me in. I'm sick of this shit too,"

"Who isn't?" Naruto asked.

---

The school day had ended. The boys walked home in a group, minus Itachi who was probably smoking with some hobos behind a convenience store like he does from time to time. Naruto, Sasuke and Shikamaru, the brains behind the operation, were trying to come up with ideas.

"How about we release three squirrels into the school," Naruto began. "One numbered one, a second numbered two and a third numbered four,"

"Didn't you forget three?" Sasuke asked.

"That's the whole point. They'd be looking for three the whole time when there isn't one,"

They laughed at the plan. "That's a start," Shikamaru said.

"How about we turn the teachers against each other," Chouji suggested.

"How do you suppose we do that?" Sasuke asked.

Chouji pulled a key from his pocket. "This is the master key. We can get into anything with it. We go inside some teacher's room, take some stuff and place it in another teacher's room,"

"I like your thinkin' Chouji," Naruto said. "Good stuff,"

"It's like that song...Anarchy for the UK," Sasuke said. "Except different,"

Seemingly out of nowhere, the boys burst into song as the walked.

I am an anti-Christ   
I am an anarchist,   
don't know what I want   
but I know how to get it.   
I wanna destroy the passer by   
'cos I wanna be anarchy,   
Ho dogs body

**End Notes: What can I say. High school fics are fun. Especially when they're about stuff you can only dream of doing.**


	2. We're All to Blame

**Anarchy for Konoha High**

**Chapter 2: We're All to Blame**

**Notes: **Thanks for all the reviews guys. Makes me want to keep writing. So anyway, here's the second chapter.

The loud blaring of his alarm clock woke Naruto from a sound sleep. He rolled over and slapped the sleep button so he could get an extra five or ten minutes of sleep before going to school. After a night of dreaming up schemes, this was one of the first days he had actually looked forward to school. When he finally stepped out of bed, thoughts of the days events swam in his mind, making him smile. He quickly changed his clothes, brushed his teeth and hair and was out the door.

Naruto met up with Sasuke, Shikamaru and Neji at the bus corner.

"Are you ready?" he asked them.

They nodded with a smirk. "Of coarse," Sasuke said,

A few minutes later, Sakura and Ino showed up. Ino was carrying a small duffle bag with her right hand which contents weren't even known by Naruto or Sasuke.

"What's in the bag Ino?" Naruto asked.

She opened it up and revealed cherry bombs, smoke bombs, bottle rockets and one M80. The boys smiled at the pyrotechnics.

"How will you get them into the school?" Neji asked. "Obviously they're going to search the bag,"

"Watch," Ino said.

She dumped the books out of her backpack and threw the books into the bushes. She then placed the duffle bag into her backpack and smiled.

"See? Simple,"

"I like the way you think," Shikamaru said.

The bus rumbled up to the stop and opened the door for them to get on. They showed the bus driver their Konoha High I.D. cards and walked past him. Naruto and Sasuke took the two seats in the back of the bus. Naruto on the left, Sasuke the right. Sakura and Ino sat together in front of them. Shikamaru sat alone in the seat next to them and Neji sat in front of Sakura and Ino. After a few stops, Chouji, Lee and Ten Ten all got on the bus. Chouji sat with Shikamaru, Ten Ten with Neji and Lee sat by himself. Lee turned back to Shikamaru and asked him a question.

"So, what is the plan today guys? What's my job?"

Shikamaru smiled. "Basically, we're gonna have you be a distraction by running around biting at people. We on the other hand will be pulling various pranks around the school,"

Lee sat dumbfounded at his job. "A-are you sure that's what you want me to do?"

Naruto, Sasuke and Shikamaru smiled. "Yes. Exactly,"

---

The bus stopped in front of the large white school building. Naruto and his crew walked off the bus and ran behind a tall brick fence.

"Say goodbye to uniforms!" Naruto laughed.

Naruto tore off his uniform to reveal a white Led Zeppelin shirt with jeans, a brown belt and green shoes. Sasuke wore a gray 'Listen to Bob Marley' shirt, khaki pants a black belt and orange shoes. Shikamaru had a black shirt with AFI written in red and jeans. Neji removed his own uniform, revealing a black shirt with 'Spent My Lunch Money On Video Games Again' wirtten on it and jeans. The girls each took off their uniforms, showing that they wore some very revealing clothes. When they all turned to Lee, he looked back at them with a confused face.

"What the hell Lee? Where is your stuff?" Neji asked.

Lee looked back and forth and smiled. "Heh. Didn't know we were supposed to change,"

The group all walked in a straight line up to the school, Naruto and Sasuke in the middle, Shikamaru, Chouji and Sakura to Naruto's left, Neji, Ino and Ten Ten to Sasuke's right. Lee was running behind them, trying to catch up. The group caught the glances of almost all of their classmates. They all stood silent at the flagrent break in school dress code waiting for a teacher to give them detentons. Without fear, they all walked into the school and turned to Lee. He frowned at them and walked in front of them. He then took off through the halls screaming at the top of his lungs.

"Hey! Look at my eyebrows! You think they come off like that guy in FLCL? Why don't you give them a tug!"

"Here's our chance!" Naruto said. "Sasuke, Shikamaru come with me. Neji, you take the girls and Chouji. We'll meet back here in five!"

Ino tossed them a little bag of explosives and ran off with Neji, Sakura, Ten Ten and Chouji. Naruto and his group ran off in the opposite direction and went upstairs. With pandemonium ensuing downstairs, they found the nearest bathroom on the upper floor and walked inside. Lucky for them it was still empty. Naruto and Sasuke pulled out three cherry bombs from the bag while Shikamaru pulled a book of matches from his pocket. He lit them and they each placed one in a stall. Before the little bombs exploded, they ran out of the bathroom and went back to the stairs.

On the lower floor, Neji, Chouji and the girls were inside the janitor's closet stocking up on spray paint and other items. They ran out of the small room and stopped. Neji tossed a can of spray paint to each of them. They shook the can up and removed the top. In a different color, they scrawled 'Anarchy for Konoha High' on the walls around them as much as they could before running out of paint.

As Lee continued to run wild, dodging teachers and suck up students, Naruto, Sasuke and Shikamaru all stood at the top of the stairs.

"Here's where my plan comes into action!" Naruto laughed.

Late last night, Naruto had managed to catch three squirrels and number them 1, 2 and 4. He pulled the cage from his backpack and opened the latch. The little woodland creatures ran wildly aross the floor. One went down the stairs while the other two ran off to Naruto's right. Sasuke jumped down the stairs, and Naruto and Shikamaru followed. They ran down the stairs and regrouped with Neji, Chouji, Sakura, Ino and Ten Ten. They then casually walked out of the school while behind them insane students ran wild.

---

"Tell me who started all of this!" the principal screamed in Lee's face.

Lee looked at him and smiled. "You're not getting anything out of me,"

"Do you know the kind of damage these students caused today? And what is this Anarchy for Konoha High bullshit?!"

"Apparently some students want chance and you just don't want move forward," Lee said.

The prinicpal placed a hand on his forehead. "We'll discuss this matter tomorrow Mr. Lee. Report to my office before school tomorrow,"

As Lee left the room he turned toward the principal and three teachers standing around him and smiled.

"Wha Ta!" he screeched in a Bruce Lee fashion, breaking the lamp with a back handed hit.

He ran out of the room out of the school. On his way home, he saw Naruto's head pop out from a group of large bushes.

"Naruto!" he yelled. "Why did you leave me there?! I was mauled by six teachers and then screamed at by the principal. Do you know how much trouble we're in?!"

"You didn't rat us out did you?" Naruto asked.

"No. Of coarse not. But I think we should stop while we're ahead. This could get s in serious trouble,"

"Quit bitching about it and come with us to Chouji's house. We have a new plan," Sasuke said, popping up next to Naruto.

The teenage anarchists flied out of the bush and stood around Lee.

"Let's go," Shikamaru said.

---

As they sat in Chouji's room, Lee felt like more and more like he was in over his head. He watched all of his friends talk happily about destroying the school, one brick at a time. Chouji finally came in the room with a small bag. Right as Chouji was about to close the door, Lee stood up.

"May I use your bathroom Chouji-san?"

"Yeah, sure. First door on the right,"

Lee got up, walked out of the room and closed the door. Chouji sat on his bed and dumped the contents of the bag on the sheets.

"What's the keys for?" Sakura asked.

Chouji held one up. "These are the master keys. We can get into any room we want with these. This is how we execute my plan,"

"You mean turn the teachers against each other?" Ten Ten asked.

"Exactly. What we do is go back there later and do it then,"

The group nodded. Chouji handed a key to each of his friends and sat back down on his bed.

"How did you get this copied?" Sakura asked. "It says do not copy on it,"

"My dad has this friend who works at Wal-Mart and I got him drunk so he didn't know what the hell he was doing," Chouji explained.

"Didn't he ask about the do not copy on there?" Shikamaru asked.

"Yeah, but I said it was for a school project,"

"Well played my friend," Naruto said.

"Where the hell is Lee?" Sasuke wondered. "Shouldn't he be back by now?"

"Yeah. He should," Naruto replied.

The group got up and went to the bathroom, only to find it empty.

"That bastard's gonna narc on us man!" Shikamaru said.

Lee was running down the street as fast as he could, trying to get away from his crazied comrades.

_I should tell the police but. Do I really want to risk losing my friendships?_

Lee jumped into a bush on the side of the sidewalk and rested. Little did he know, Naruto and company were closer than he thought.

"Look at that bush! It's moving!" Chouji yelled.

Lee jumped from his hiding place and began to run down the sidewalk again. Still tired from running before, he was no match for Naruto and Sasuke. They tackled him to the ground and skidded up his face, making him bleed.

"What the hell are you doing!" Naruto screamed. "This is a partnership!"

"I'm in over my head Naruto-san. I can't do this!"

Naruto let go of his shirt coller and stood up.

"Fine. We'll leave you alone. But if you say a word, you'll be brought down with us. And you wouldn't like that," Sasuke pointed out.

"Why me!" Lee asked.

"Guilty by association," Naruto told him. "Simple as that,"

Lee turned away and began to walk toward his house. Naruto and Sasuke returned to the group and turned back to Chouji's house as well.

"Four hours boys," Neji said.

---

It was 8:00pm. The sun had just set and the group was standing outside the brick wall of the school. With a fence blocking their entrance, they had thrown a rope over the wall so they could reach the school. Naruto and Sasuke went over first to anchor down the rope for the rest to climb over. Shikamaru and Neji went next, and after that the rest followed. Once over, they made their way to the school and went around the back door. Neji jumped up onto Shikamaru's shoulders and peered into the window above the security door. Two security guards were taking turns watching the monitor and watching 'The Tonight Show' on a small 19'' TV. Neji opened the window slightly, lit a smoke bomb and dropped it in.

The group hid behind some garbage cans andwaited for the guards to come rushing out. When they did, the group ran inside the security door and locked it behind them. Due to the smoke, the security guards' eyes were watering and they were rubbing them to get the smoke out.

"Sakura, you shut off the cameras. Chouji, open that door,"

Sakura turned the cameras off and they walked through the newly opened door. Each of them turned on the flashlights they had brought and lit up the small area they occupied.

"Ok. Everyone got their keys?" Naruto asked.

Everyone nodded. "Ok. Each of you pick a classroom and choose and expensive looking object and meet back here," Naruto instructed.

They all split up and entered different classrooms. Naruto found a golden necklace, Sasuke found a diamond ring, Shikamaru took some confiscated walkie talkies, Neji took four staplers and a box of pencils while the girls all chose porcelin fruit from various rooms. Once they met in their spot, the only problem was to find the teacher that they'd plant it on.

"How about our bastard math teacher?" Sasuke suggested.

They all agreed and unlocked his door, and placed the objects all around the room. Laughs and feminine giggles escaped their lips as they left. Instead of leaving the way they came in, they took one of the deactivated fire exits, climbed their rope again and landed back on the sidewalk.

"Well that was fun," Sasuke said. "But what now?"

Naruto stretched. "I'm fucking tired. I'm going home man,"

"Yeah. We should all get some sleep," Sakura agreed.

"Until tomorrow guys," Naruto said.

"Yes...tomorrow," Sasuke laughed.

**End Notes: **Phew...all done. Well there it is, the MUCH longer 2nd chapter. The third chapter 'Sweet Dreams Are Made of These'


	3. Sweet Dreams Are Made Of These

**Anarchy For Konoha High**

**Chapter 3: Sweet Dreams Are Made of These**

**Notes: **Thanks again for the reviews. Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I just needed some time to get the creative juices going again.

The icy air around Naruto and his bundled up friends caused their breath to appear as steam in front of them. Even though they were inside of their school, ice covered the walls and the floor. Stalagmites of ice hung from the ceiling, threatening to fall on them at any moment.

"Will this damn ceremony speed up?" Chouji complained.

"Hey," Naruto said to him.

"What? he replied.

"Shut up,"

Naruto turned his attention back to the big cauldron sitting in the middle of the room. Seconds later, the crowd began to cheer as a little baby came running into the room holding a torch. He then tripped over a bump in the carpet and fell face first onto the ground. He shook his head, picked up the torch and then began to run again. A few yards later, he fell again.

"Troublesome baby...keeps falling down," Shikamaru said.

"Oh, babies fall down all the time," a teacher voiced from behind him.

Shikamaru shook his head and sighed. "Why do we have to be here? Shouldn't we be practicing?"

"Well...isn't every team supposed to be at the opening ceremonies of the Olympics," Sakura said.

The baby had finally made it to the cauldron and lit it up. Just then, the pope walked into the room and up to a podium.

"I now declare the Olympics open!"

"About time!" Naruto yelled. "I'm freezing my ass off!"

"Hey young man! Get up here!" the pope demanded.

Naruto walked up to the podium. "You rang pope?" he asked.

"That's Pope Jo-"

"Yeah yeah yeah. I know," Naruto said cutting him off.

"How dare you!" the pope exclaimed.

"How dare I? How dare I? How dare I cut you off. You think that's bad. You ain't seen nothing yet,"

Naruto took the pope's pope hat and put it on his head and turned to the crowd.

"Look at me, I'm the pope. Would you like to read the bible? I would because I'm the pope. Would you like to wear this pope hat? I would because I'm the pope!"

The pope quickly grabbed his hat back and told his security to seize Naruto. After a few missed attempts at catching him, Naruto ran back to his friends.

"I'm sick of this shit! Fellow students...let's take over the school!"

The crowd of students cheered and began to grab teachers, administrators and security guards. As the scrum of students and teachers happened down the hall, Naruto and co. ran the opposite way to wait for the fireworks to die down.

---

Naruto and Sasuke walked down the hall with wide smile's on their face. They looked back and forth at the students holding canoe paddles that guarded various doors.

"What's the lookout Shikamaru?" Sasuke asked.

"It's good sirs. We've got all of the adults in the school into a small room in the E building. It's being guarded by Chouji and Neji,"

"Very good. Continue with your duties," Naruto said.

They continued to walk down the hall. Surveying all they commanded. They had convinced all of the students that they were the leaders of this regime...and it worked. As they made their way to the cafeteria, Naruto spoke up.

"It's good to be king. Isn't it Sasuke?"

"Don't you mean co-kings?" Sasuke said.

"As yes. Of coarse my good pal,"

When they entered the cafeteria, four students bowed down to them.

"Sirs, we have opened all the vaults to the food. What is your choice?"

Naruto and Sasuke looked at each other and smiled. "Chicken sandwiches for everyone!"

The crowd of students went crazy and began to storm the vault of sandwiches.

Back in the prison room. The teachers stewed over how they were easily taken over.

"How could this have happened?" and old Us History teacher asked.

"Shut up prisoner!" Chouji shouted.

"You can;t talk to me like that! I'm your teacher!"

Chouji found a dog food bowl on the floor (which probably belonged to Akamaru) and threw it at the teacher, hitting him in the head.

"When we say no talking. We mean no talking!" Neji commanded.

Knowing they were in a predicament, the teachers obeyed and sat in silence on the cold floor...except one. That one teacher had a cell phone with 911 on speed dial.

---

Naruto and Sasuke gorged themselves with chicken sandwiches in the cafeteria until Sakura and Ino franticly ran up to them.

"Naruto, Sasuke!" they screamed.

"What is it?" Naruto asked.

"There is a wall of squad cars outside and about four SWAT vehicles and all of the policemen have firearms!" Sakura exclaimed.

"Shit! We gotta get out of here!"

With that, Shikamaru, Chouji and Neji all ran into the cafeteria. "Let's go the hell outta here!" Chouji yelled.

"Where are all of our men!" Sasuke demanded.

"They've all defected to the other side sir!" Shikamaru said.

"Dammit! Let's just go!"

They all ran into the kitchen and found a heat vent in the ceiling. Naruto and Sasuke boosted Sakura and Ino into it first and then followed them up with boosts from Chouji and Shikamaru. Neji and Shikamaru closely followed them and they all carried Chouji into the vent. They all crawled until they found an opening to the ceiling and knocked the screen out. They climbed out and crawled over to the edge of the building. All of their classmates were being taken from the school and into vans. The six went to the opposite side of the building and jumped off the school into a row of bushes below them.

Naruto popped his head from the bush and saw three huge SWAT officers standing above them. Just as they grabbed his arms, he woke up from a sound sleep. He rolled over and saw that his alarm clock read 4:27AM. He rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling.

_Wow...that was weird yet cool at the same time._

---

Naruto joined up with Sasuke,Shikamaru ad Neji at the bus stop and began to explain his whole dream to them. They looked at him like he was insane but laughed at the thought. After a few minutes of talking, the bus rumbled up to the stop and the boys entered the big yellow vehicle. A few stops later, Sakura, Ino and the others got on the bus and sat near Naruto and Sasuke.

"So, what are our plans for today?" Ino asked.

"Nothing. We're going to play it smooth today," Shikamaru said.

"Yeah. Act just as surprised that all of that shit went down last night as everyone else," Sasuke told them.

"Gotcha," the girls replied.

"You know what really bothers me though?" Neji spoke up.

"What's that?" Chouji inquired.

"We haven't seen Temari ever since we explained what our plan was,"

"That's because she moved back to the sand village to be with her 'family'" Sakura explained. "You didn't know that?"

"No I didn't. Thank you,"

The bus reached the school and to everyone's surprise, police cars and news vans littered the courtyard in front of the school. Reporters and police officers questioned students entering the school as well as escort Naruto's math teachers, the victim of their mayhem last night.

"You can't do this, I've done nothing!" the teacher shouted.

"We'll decide that down in the station buddy," the police officer said.

Naruto turned to Sasuke. "We sure made a circus out of this place didn't we,"

"Yeah...worse than I expected. But still good,"

The group walked into school and saw that even inside was flooded with reporters and police officers. As they walked to their respective first period classes, an announcement came over the loud speaker.

"Attention students! Due to the large amount of police and news reporters, school has been canceled for the day. Please report back to your buses,"

"Nice, a day without school. But what to do," Shikamaru said.

"I have an idea," Naruto laughed.

**End Notes: **Sorry it took so long to update. I just needed some new ideas and stuff. And for those who haven't read my other random comedy fic GO!!!, check it out. It's just as good.


	4. Hitchin' A Ride

Anarchy for Konoha High

Chapter 4: Hitchin' A Ride

**Notes: **Thanks for the reviews again folks. Yeah I know it's been forever. But it's up now and hopefully more to come soon. Here's your fix boys and girls.

-

As they left the school walls, Sasuke spoke up.

"Hey Naruto, what exactly is your idea for today? More schemes?"

"Why rack your brain on a day off? I say we go cruisin' around town and look for Jones Soda," Naruto said.

Sasuke pointed at him and smiled. "Yeah man. I mean, what the hell else do we have to do,"

"Whose car we taking?" Shikamaru asked.

"Mine. It'll be fun," Sasuke said.

"Yeah...I still don't have my license which pisses me off," Naruto sighed.

They stepped on the bus and went to their usual seats. Seven seats back. Naruto on the right, Sasuke on the left, Shikamaru behind Sasuke, Sakura and Ino behind Naruto, Chouji in front of Naruto and Neji in front of Sasuke. As the bus took off, they began to talk about the recent defection of Rock Lee.

"Dude, Rock Lee is such a fuckin' flake dude. He wussed out before we even started," Sasuke said.

"I know man. It pisses me off how he knows all this stuff. I sware...if he narcs on us i'll kill him," Naruto added.

"Don't worry about that. Like you said yourself, he's guilty by association man," Chouji said. "But it'll be good to get all this stuff of our mind for a day,"

"Yeah," Shikamaru sighed. "Are you actually coming with us to do something?"

"Hell no man...i'm going home and playing Halo 2. Screw all that," Chouji told them.

"Well no Jones for you," Naruto joked in the 'Soup Nazi's' voice.

"Whatever," Chouji replied, putting his headphones on and slumping down into his seat.

-

Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru and Neji all got off at their bus stop. They all parted ways after making their plans for the afternoon. Neji went his way, Shikamaru his while Naruto and Sasuke walked to Sasuke's house.

"Man this should be fun. Cruisin' around with chicks and our buddies looking for pop and stuff," Naruto said.

"Oh you know it buddy," Sasuke laughed. "This will definatly be a fun time,"

When they reached Sasuke's house, they ditched their uniforms and back packs, grabbed the keys and took off. They picked up Shikamaru first, then Sakura and Ino. At the last minute Neji decided to stay behind to spend some 'quality time' with his new girlfriend TenTen.

"So. What do you guys make of Neji and TenTen going to see a movie?" Shikamaru laughed.

"Hell, they won't make it there. And if they do, I don't think they'll know what movie they saw if you asked them," Sasuke said.

"What really creepy is...they're probably at Neji's place. His parents aren't even home," Naruto added.

"You wanna be total assholes and crash the 'party'?" Shikamaru joked.

"Nah. Let'em have their fun. Wouldn't want them to do that to any of us would you," Sasuke said.

"Good point," Shikamaru voiced.

"But just think man. People sleep on those beds and couches," Naruto pointed out.

Everyone shivered and laughed at the same time. Sasuke took a hard turn and everyone was thrown against the left side of the car.

"Hey, slow down partner, remember the time you hit that median?" Naruto asked.

-**Flashback**-

Sasuke, Naruto, Shikamaru and Neji were all driving down the highway with their heads out the window and the speedometer on 90mph. Their faces became numb from the cold air and people in passing cars laughed at them. As they laeft the highway, Sasuke was still driving around 45 mph when they came to a turn.

"Sasuke, don't slow down! Take the turn at full speed!" Naruto shouted.

Sasuke did so and as he did, his car slid on a patch of snow and he slid over a median in the road. As he hit the median, his hub cap popped off and bent his axle a little bit. Naruto jumped out of the car, grabbed the hub cap and jumped back into the car as they rode away.

-**End Flashback**-

"Yeah...we don't want that again do we?" Shikamaru asked.

"No...we don't," Sasuke replied.

A few minutes later, the group ended up at 'Bullseye'. A store in town that sold just about anything. They quickly made their way to the beverage section and gazed upward toward the shelf.

"Ladies and gentlemen...I give you Jones Soda," Naruto said.

Sasuke and Naruto grabbed four six packs of Green Apple soda and handed one to Shikamaru, Sakura and Ino. They all walked to he check out and Naruto gave Sasuke some money for it since they were spliting the cost.

After getting it bagged, they went back to Sasuke's car.

"Now that you're all seated...be prepared for the most amazing experience ever!" Sasuke proclaimed.

"What about sex?" Shikamaru asked.

"How the fuck would you know? We all know you haven't had a girlfriend since 8th grade and your hand doesn't count," Naruto said.

Sasuke tossed a Jones soda to Shikamaru and smiled. "Cheer up buddy. You'll get there...eventually,"

As they took a drink from each of their bottles of soda, their faces lit up.

"This is the greatest drink i've ever had!" Sakura shouted.

"I told you guys," Naruto said. "This is the best drink ever!"

As they drove back toward Naruto's house to hang out in his basement, they saw a swarm of police cars outside of Rock Lee's house.

Naruto and Sasuke looked at eachother. "Fuck!"

**End Notes: **Yes I know it took long but i'm back now for a while. AfKH5 will be up in much less than half the time this one was. And there might be a Valentine's Day special as well...not sure though. Until then...


End file.
